Be Your Own Valentine

Anxiety is a distraction spurred by fear. It allows us to avoid facing who we really are. It is rooted in failure to accept what does not seem right or good in ourselves or in our lives. We reject ourselves first in anticipation of rejection by others. We self-criticize and sabotage possibilities through judgmental non-allowance.

Feeling worthy is something that many of us have been conditioned to experience through performance. This is backwards as a sense of internal self-value is necessary to connect in a healthy way with others. Self-compassion encourages kindness to self so that you have kindness to share. Paying attention to what is going on inside of you requires that we stop trying to run away from ourselves (why not try to bite your own nose). Of course, we would rather not look at the rejected aspects.

Facing fears is essential to the difficult work of change. Take comfort in the knowledge that we will make mistakes even when we do our best. We are human and all very connected in this commonality. Willingness to proceed, possibly fearfully, undermines the need to self-handicap. It pulls the rug out from under the procrastination. Our recognition of inevitable failures takes away the sting and dismantles our incessant attempts to save face when we do fail.

Be your own Valentine! Appreciate you, your life and allow that love to shine out so others can see their own value reflected.

Cindi